This is What Rejection Means
On the night of Pitch Wars announcements, I would like to announce that I wasn't chosen. This is coming on the heels of two rejection letters from literary agents too. Why am I telling you this? I think it's important to share the tough parts of every journey--not just the highlights. People need to see other people being people, and part of being people is rejection. Especially if you're in the arts because art is so subjective. So, I got rejected, and you got rejected, Nancy down the street got rejected, and the future NYT Bestseller got rejected. Now what?
First: Feel.
Let yourself feel how you feel without judgement. Are you disappointed? That's okay. Are you bummed? That's okay. Do you feel discouraged? That's okay. Did it light a fire under your bottom? Cool. Is this another Tuesday for you? All right. There's no wrong answer. No wrong way to feel. Everyone handles rejection differently, so just let it be.
Next: Celebrate!
YOU DID A BIG THING. Lots of big things. You dedicated time and effort to get that book done, revised, and polished. You sacrificed TV binging for your dream, and anyone with a Netflix account knows that's a huge deal. And then you overcame self-doubt, self-sabotage, self-rejections, all the battles of Self, and you put your book out there. That's amazing! So YES, celebrate. You deserve it. You earned it.
And then: Re-evaluate.
Have you gotten specific feedback in your rejections? How about from critique partners or beta readers? Ask yourself, "Why did my book get rejected?" Notice the first thing that comes to mind because that's probably your subconscious or instincts telling you what it is you can learn and improve. But don't overthink it! Don't go into self-deprecation because that will serve you zero percent. Just pick one thing you can work on right now.
And when you're ready: Learn and improve.
Read everything you can on the topic. Is your dialogue off? Read about crafting dialogue every day. Go sit in a coffee shop and listen to people talk. Practice tightening little bits of your dialogue until it gets better and better and better. There's absolutely no shame in improvement! The only shame is in thinking you know it it, have it all, and don't need to learn or grow. That'll keep you stuck. But growth is something every author should have at every step in their career.
Finally: Try again.
Maybe this means another revision. Maybe more edits. Maybe polishing that query letter and synopsis again. And then send it out to another wave of agents or enter a new pitch contest. Or maybe maybe maybe it feels right to shelf this book for now and start fresh with a new book. Only you can know what's right for you. And only you can know the right timeline.
Whatever you choose, don't let rejection keep you down. If you let it, rejection only means one thing: You're on your way to that shiny end goal.
First: Feel.
Let yourself feel how you feel without judgement. Are you disappointed? That's okay. Are you bummed? That's okay. Do you feel discouraged? That's okay. Did it light a fire under your bottom? Cool. Is this another Tuesday for you? All right. There's no wrong answer. No wrong way to feel. Everyone handles rejection differently, so just let it be.
Next: Celebrate!
YOU DID A BIG THING. Lots of big things. You dedicated time and effort to get that book done, revised, and polished. You sacrificed TV binging for your dream, and anyone with a Netflix account knows that's a huge deal. And then you overcame self-doubt, self-sabotage, self-rejections, all the battles of Self, and you put your book out there. That's amazing! So YES, celebrate. You deserve it. You earned it.
And then: Re-evaluate.
Have you gotten specific feedback in your rejections? How about from critique partners or beta readers? Ask yourself, "Why did my book get rejected?" Notice the first thing that comes to mind because that's probably your subconscious or instincts telling you what it is you can learn and improve. But don't overthink it! Don't go into self-deprecation because that will serve you zero percent. Just pick one thing you can work on right now.
And when you're ready: Learn and improve.
Read everything you can on the topic. Is your dialogue off? Read about crafting dialogue every day. Go sit in a coffee shop and listen to people talk. Practice tightening little bits of your dialogue until it gets better and better and better. There's absolutely no shame in improvement! The only shame is in thinking you know it it, have it all, and don't need to learn or grow. That'll keep you stuck. But growth is something every author should have at every step in their career.
Finally: Try again.
Maybe this means another revision. Maybe more edits. Maybe polishing that query letter and synopsis again. And then send it out to another wave of agents or enter a new pitch contest. Or maybe maybe maybe it feels right to shelf this book for now and start fresh with a new book. Only you can know what's right for you. And only you can know the right timeline.
Whatever you choose, don't let rejection keep you down. If you let it, rejection only means one thing: You're on your way to that shiny end goal.
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